anti-contraction medication

"My Funny Valentine" - Babes in Arms

At this point, I have already celebrated many holidays here at the hospital, but they did have to be modified due to the circumstances. For instance, my Hanukkah menorah was made up of electric candles instead of real ones, I didn't drink any champagne on New Year's Eve, and most importantly, my awesome "Dirty Thirty" travel birthday plans were completely cancelled. Now with Valentine's Day on the horizon, I knew this February 14th would be very different from all of the ones before. Even so, my husband and I both had plans to make this Valentine's Day as normal as possible and use it as another excuse to express our love for one another. Before I get into the festivities, there were some major developments that happened the day before. Out of the blue I started having lots of contractions which was strange because there was not anything that I was doing differently with my activity level. I was still just lying in bed 99% of the day. About two weeks prior, my doctor did take me off of the anti-contraction medication I was on since my amniotic fluid levels were getting low, and that was a possible side effect from the meds. They were monitoring me closely to make sure that the fluid levels went back to normal, which they did, and that I was not having any more contractions. Everything was going just fine until February 13th when my contractions kicked into high gear. I have never been able to feel any of these contractions for whatever reason but they show up on the contraction monitor and alert the nurses that there is an issue. One or two contractions every couple of hours is not a big deal, but on Monday they jumped up to nine per hour! It was a good thing that I was not able to feel them because they were not very intense but the frequency was concerning because quantity could be dangerous regardless of the level of intensity. I was started on a new anti-contraction medication that night which gave me a lot of unpleasant side effects. The side effects did not hurt the babies at all but they made me very uncomfortable while my body was getting used to this new drug. In addition, I now had to be woken up to take the medication every six hours so at midnight and 6:00am my sleep was interrupted. Other than being woken up to take the medication, every time I was having contractions, the nurse would come in to wake me up to empty my bladder to help stop the contractions. If your bladder is full, there is less room for the uterus and contractions are more likely to occur until the bladder is emptied. Overall, this new fiasco meant very little sleep for me and more importantly a fear that this complication could get worse.

The next day after barely sleeping, Brett came by in the morning and surprised me with two bouquets of roses, balloons, and wall decorations for my room. He brought me an amazing gift as well which was one of our wedding pictures blown up onto a canvas. I cried when I opened it because it was so thoughtful and beautiful. I had already given Brett his gift the week before since all of my shopping had to be done online and shipped out. I ordered him a Burke Williams Spa gift card so that he can have some relaxation between taking care of me, the kitties, the bills, the apartment, etc. So far, my Valentine's Day was pretty awesome considering the circumstances. He left for work and then came back in the evening with take-out from Buca Di Beppo which was so much better than the usual hospital cafeteria food. Luckily, throughout the day, the medication had started to work with me having less contractions than before but still not as few as when I was on the first medication. Regardless of this new scary situation, I just focused on enjoying the holiday and visualizing my uterus calming down so that I could get another couple of months to have these babies cook. I never imagined that our last Valentine's Day without kids would be like this but in the end, we made the best of it and now we can look forward to sharing this holiday with our twins in the years to come.

*The song "My Funny Valentine" is from the 1937 Broadway musical Babes in Armsby Rogers & Hart. This song became a very famous standard after being in the show and most people today don't even know that it originated from this early musical. For me, this song represents how even though you may not have the most perfect Valentine or Valentine's Day, it really doesn't matter because love is what is truly important. I did have a "funny" Valentine's Day with not being able to go out on a real date with my husband and being stuck in bed with scary contractions, but we made it work. This whole bed rest experience has been about adapting to change and embracing it instead of getting upset that expectations have been skewed. Just one more life lesson to work on by the time the twins arrive.

These put a smile on my face

These put a smile on my face

Our wedding photo on canvas

Our wedding photo on canvas

"I Know Things Now" - Into the Woods

Sometimes when you finally get something you really want or desire, it does not turn out to be as great as expected. With so many freedoms and privileges taken away due to being on bed rest, any taste of normal should be celebrated, but I soon discovered that living in this altered life, normal is not worth the trouble in some cases. Let the shower story begin! So I was taken downstairs for another ultrasound which was great because I was able to escape my room yet again. This was a quick scan just to check that the amniotic fluid levels were not getting low since that is a common side effect of the anti-contraction medication that I am on. Everything was looking great so I asked the doctor if I could finally take a shower since it had been a month since I arrived at the hospital and these sponge baths were not the best. I heard from my other friends here on bed rest, that a five minute shower in a chair was an option if the doctor allowed it. My doctor said that he would have to think about it so I was not sure if it would actually happen, but I did inform the nurses about my request to hopefully expedite the approval. One amazing thing did happen on the way back up to my room after the ultrasound...I got to go outside! There was a small patio which I spotted and quickly convinced the nurse with me to have my wheelchair pushed out. It was the first time since December 21st that I got to breathe in fresh air and be out in the open. Even though it was only for two minutes, I took it all in and it was completely glorious.

My elation continued as later in the day I found out that my shower was in fact approved! I decided to take it at night because my hubby would be there to help me with this process since I would have limited access being seated in a chair the entire time. As the shower began, my excitement quickly faded once I realized that my so-called relaxing shower would be anything but. First of all, the water pressure was extremely low and there were no alternative settings on the shower head to fix this making it very difficult to get all of the soap out of my hair. In addition, sitting down while showering is a lot harder than it looks because I am so limited with movement and not everything is getting completely cleaned or rinsed due to my position. Also, the tub itself was so narrow that they had to place the chair in sideways so I wasn't able to sit properly on it. To top that off...I had only five minutes to get everything done so I was working really hard to meet that deadline with all of the obstacles in my way. By the time I was finished, I didn't even feel that clean and was completely exhausted. Because I am lying down 99% of the time, any physical activity is a huge deal. Just walking to the bathroom, my heart starts to race due to my extremely low activity level. Now I just spent the past five minutes feverishly trying to clean every inch of my body and it feels like I just ran a 5K without stopping. What I thought would be such a treat turned out to be such a let down and I realized that I wouldn't be able to take a good shower until I am home and back in my comfort zone.

For now I will have to just stick with the sponge baths and getting my hair washed in a sink once a week. It is not ideal, but far better than attempting to shower with limitations which don't make me feel good. Also, by sitting down in the shower, even just for five minutes and exerting myself the way I did, I realized it was definitely not worth it if it affected the babies in anyway. They probably only felt some extra movement than what they are used to but in the end, why risk it?

*The song "I Know Things Now" is from the 1987 Broadway musical Into the Woodsby Stephen Sondheim which mashes together several fairy tales set to an adult theme. The song itself is sung by Little Red Riding Hood where she talks about her encounter with the Big Bad Wolf and how in a way, she lost her innocence and learned a huge lesson about trust. The lesson I learned about my shower was definitely not as profound, but now I know that taking one is just not good for me or my babies. It is just one more lesson I am learning about making sacrifices for my children and focusing on what is in their best interest and not my own. I will take a really awesome shower when I get home where everything will be comfortable and familiar while the babies are safe with their Daddy. Until then, the shower alternatives at the hospital still get the job done so don't be afraid to visit me...I promise you that I am clean and smell lovely!

Shower drama

Shower drama